August 3, 2011

I'm not bitter....I'm just trying it on for size!

Now I wouldn't say I'm this bad...
but sometimes I feel like it.
I have to admit, lately I have noticed I don't poses the same amount of patience and understanding as I used to (or maybe I have always been a bitch but am more self aware).  My ugly side certainly came through loud and clear as I muddled my way through the slow moving crowds of the cruise ship and when I had to continually repeat myself before my hearing impaired travelling companion heard me. My patience with impoliteness has gone down significantly (i.e. talking in a movie theatre) and, although I try my very best, I can get a little...."excited" while driving behind a tourist going 50k in an 80k zone.  But why?

I need this on a T-shirt!
Ironically, I teach an anger management course (I like to refer to it as emotional management to avoid the stigma thing) for people wanting to prevent stress and illness due to acute bouts of frustration - we all experience at times. I understand the thinking errors we are influenced by and the triggers that can take us from our happy place to place we dare not mention. I am also aware that anger is a signal that something else may be bugging why am I angry? Why, after a week on a boat with my mother, did I have an angry outburst on my cell phone with my sister in the middle of the Vancouver bus station with everyone looking at me like I was crazy? Why?
The possible answer to my burning question is one that almost had me fall off my elliptical trainer as I read it. I was reading a magazine for 40 plus women (they make these? fabulous!) when I came across a piece written by a woman finding herself becoming more and more angry with those around her. She was tearing apart her relationships and feeling the resulting isolation that comes from chronic pissyness (yes, I do believe that is the correct terminology). Her revelation? She was in perimenapause damn it! Due to the hormonal fluctuations during this time, it can influence many women to turn to the dark side. There is no motive behind it and the angry woman is left wondering why the hell she just lost it on the bag boy at the grocery store or the dog walker without a poop bag. It may come down to those stupid ass hormones....yet again! Of course, anger is correlated to depression...they can be one of the same.  It is not uncommon for women in this "stage of life" (God, I sound like a health and hygiene instructor) to go through unexplained bouts of depression that, while in the past were blamed on PMS, are mysterious and long lived.  Could that be me????

Yup...think I got 'em all

The article went on to suggest a few simple ways to help fight these feelings and make your "transition" less bumpy. Guess what they said? Just guess......  Give up? To help alleviate the emotional (and physical) symptoms of perimenopause and menopause one should exercise every day, eat a healthy diet enriched with omega-3 fatty acids, and get 7-8 hours of sleep.  Ironically, a woman going through nasty hormonal fluctuations is the last person on earth wanting to eat a carrot, go for a walk, and get to bed at 9pm every night. Hormones definitely influence our behaviour (and should be destroyed) but what can we do about it?

Then it struck niche, my focus, my future! As I continue to move towards that Godforsaken change of life (not that I'm bitter or anything) I hear so many women suffer through over the years, I want to work with other women as they go through the same experiences.  For those women who haven't made exercise, eating and sleeping well a habit adding these lifestyle changes to an already changing landscape can be quite the bitch.  The additional benefit, however, is the weight loss and stamina that usually is accompanied by such a change in lifestyle.  For those of you going through this will know what I mean. For those of you looking "forward" to it in the future...plan now! To me, this is the best reason for changing lifestyle behaviour.

Personally, since I have the exercise habit down and sleeping is my favorite part, I will be focused on my diet for the sake of my sanity, my man-friend, and all those poor souls I drive behind on the highway (and meet up with in a dark theatre).  Meanwhile, a few forced happy thoughts wouldn't hurt either (I hear if you force a smile on your face for a long period of time you release "happy" hormones that will make you feel better.....can you imagine how silly I look driving down the street with a grin plastered on my face - not unlike that of the Joker?)

That's all I got.


  1. I like to refer to it as emotional management to avoid the stigma thing.

  2. Hello OnlinecasinoSuite;

    You took the words right out of my post! Thanks for your comment and time. Glad to hear there's another out there that shares my interest in taking the stigma out of emotional health.

    All the best.