May 25, 2010

Challenging My Identity...

I should have entitled this "Injuries Suck!" but I wanted to maintain some sort of professionalism.  Just wanted to write about something that really hit home for me this weekend. I had no idea how much of my identity was wrapped up in being physically active and "able" until this weekend. It appears I may have torn my vastus medialis (media quad) and it may be up to 12 weeks until I get back at it. All the biking plans I had made and the plans to get out walking, hiking, running during the summer may be changing if this diagnosis is true. My life is over! I'm going to turn to mush! I'm going to loose every once of fitness I had! least that is what I thought on the drive home during my emotional breakdown.

So I'm hobbling around and haven't exercised for over a week now. It is one thing to choose not to exercise but another altogether to be forced not to exercise. Getting on my bike is the only thing I can think of now. It does give me time to think, however, and I got to thinking about identity. We all have one. Whether we identify with our job, our role in the community, in a family, our finances, our house/car, and our bodies, we all have and hold an identity. 

Those that identify with their beauty, for example, may have a very hard time loosing those looks through aging. Those that identify with their sport, have a hard time when they can't play (due to injury). Those that have never had a weight "problem" and find themselves gaining weight, may have a harder time readjusting to a lifestyle focused on weight "management". 

No matter what you identify with, it is important to be aware of how you define yourself. Nothing stays the same; eventually things change, leave, disappear.  You are not your bank account, your partner, your fitness level, and even your body, your social status. Remove all those identifiers and who are you? If you can't answer this question, perhaps now would be a good time to think about it (before it is too late). I know I will be spending 8 - 12 weeks doing just that.

I firmly believe things happen for a reason. If you don't take time to heal your body, your body will do something to force you to take the time. I am going to take this time to readdress my training techniques, and maybe even join yoga! has come to that. I'm going to learn another way to exercise other than training hard.  I promise.  I refuse to be an old woman stuck in her chair!



  1. This is terrible news! What the h*ll happened? I'm calling you tomorrow..

  2. Thanks for your concern. I never got the call...must have been out.

  3. Poor muffin!

    Will I see you in the summer session of yoga? I never thought I would LOVE seemed too slow. When I first started to dabble in it, I used to spend the whole time watching the clock wondering when the heck was this going to be over. Now, I can't imagine not doing it.

  4. OMG,

    I've posted my first comment to a blog!!!!!
    I love your blog - lots of info with a big helping of humour. Good luck!

  5. Hi Jo-Anne!
    Thanks for your fabulous comments. I'm working on the cardio and stretching thing and promise to be in your yoga class in September. I hear the instructor is amazing!
    Thanks again for taking the time to respond.